Did you know that Porn Hub has 80 million visitors a day? To put that into perspective, that is more visits than Pinterest, Tumblr, or PayPal (Jones, 2018). Pornography is a fast-growing epidemic that is more accessible in this day and age than ever before. In 2018 alone, there were 30.3 billion internet searches for porn, which is about 962 searches per minute (Silver, 2018).
This graphic from Forbes Magazine provides a quick overview of PornHub’s stats from 2018:
Pornography consumption is clearly a problem. Like it or not, your children are going to see it at some point because of the digital age that we live in. It is our job as parents to teach them what to do when they come across it, to help them if they have already seen it, and to provide a path to recovery if they are addicted.
The purpose of this article is not to scare you; it is to educate you. If you are informed, then you will be better equipped to stand by your children in the battle against pornography that is raging all around us.
Revenge Porn
“Revenge pornography is the online, and at times offline, non-consensual distribution, or sharing, of explicit images by ex-partners, partners, others, or hackers seeking revenge or entertainment” (Hall & Hearn, 2018).
Put simply, revenge porn is when someone posts sexts, nudes, or other explicit photos or videos of another person (usually from a past romantic relationship) as a form of revenge. A popular website that deals in revenge porn is MyEx.com.
One way to stop this from happening is to teach children not to send naked pictures of themselves or anyone else to anyone. Ever.
Incest Porn
Incest porn, as you might have already guessed, is porn that portrays sexual actions between members of the same family which may include anything from parent-child to sibling-on-sibling. Incest porn may also include “fauxcest”–incest between family members that are not related by blood such as step-parents and/or step-siblings.
“A quick Pornhub search for most-viewed videos showcases a list of clips averaging between 30 to 80 million views each and 80 percent of them are fauxcest (featuring titles like “bratty sisters doing step-brothers,” “step-siblings caught in the act,” “Mommy teaches stepson a lesson,” etc.)” (Snow, 2019).
Incest porn is a growing trend largely because of the taboo nature of incest. “Fauxcest” toes the line of actual incest with the justification that it is okay because the individuals involved are not “blood” related. This type of porn is actively portrayed in popular TV shows like Game of Thrones.
Feminist Porn
Feminist porn has been gaining popularity with many women and some teenage girls because it claims to have an agenda toward gender equality.
Many justify this type of porn as “good porn” because a woman is typically directing and/or producing it. Some of these female directors even claim that feminist porn is “empowering” because their porn “captures more normal-looking women in more normal sexual encounters, with a focus on a woman’s sexual pleasure” (Weber, 2013). But this is hardly true. Most feminist porn still features women with unrealistic beauty and, like mainstream porn, still features body-punishing sex for a woman in a submissive position in relation to the man (or men) in it. It is also commonplace to see women being shamed, humiliated, or forced into non-consentual sex.
Furthermore, ALL pornography is degrading to human beings no matter who is being portrayed or who directs it. For us at Educate and Empower Kids, it is more despicable that women are selling out and exploiting other women in porn for the simple purpose of making money.
“Ethical” Porn
According to Kellie Scott’s article on ABC News, some sources define porn as being “ethical” if it meets the following requirements: it is “made legally, respects the rights of performers, has good working conditions, shows both fantasy and real-world sex and celebrates sexual diversity” (2016). But, as we mentioned, is it ever ethical to exploit another human being for money?
Also, did you know that some schools believe it is ethical to show pornography to teens? High schools like this one in Boston currently have classes that use hard-core pornography as a tool to teach kids about sex education, among other subjects. The course at the school in Boston is called “The Truth About Pornography: A Pornography-Literacy Curriculum.” In the class, a teacher shows pornography to teach students about “healthy relationships.” The class also includes a section called “Porn Literacy,” in which students watch porn and talk about what they saw. They also examine topics like dating violence and L.G.B.T. issues through the lens of pornography, “often through group discussions, role-playing and other exercises“ (Jones, 2018).
Many experts believe that portraying porn as “cool” or as an acceptable means of learning about sex is an irresponsible and damaging move when it comes to educating kids and teens.
What you can do:
Educating yourself about current pornography trends will help you know what to talk to your children about. Have sincere, one-on-one discussions about what they know or things that they may have questions about.
Prepare yourself before talking with your kids and prepare your kids for their inevitable exposure. Check out our lesson, Teach Your Child to R.U.N from Porn, for great ideas to help you along the way.
Questions you might ask your kids:
Do you know what pornography is? (If yes, ask them to tell you what they think it is. If not, explain to them what it is.)
Have you ever seen pornography before? Where? (For older kids: When was the first time you saw porn?)
What do you do when you encounter porn? What can you do in the future?
Why is looking at porn or making a habit of viewing porn a bad idea?
Honesty is the best policy when it comes to these tough topics. Honesty and education, even though webpages which give accurate information. Search well and ignore the porn webpages. It is a matter of will and training.
Source: educate empower kids organization
